I’ve seen many many oddball things on the Internet, though never would have thought I’d come across anything that’d evoke childhood memories of 香港 (Hong Kong) visiting friends & relatives of my late mother on the crowded government housing estates where there was a constant cacophony of various Chinese dialects that often sounded like quarrelling (you could never really tell) along with recollections of little old ladies practising Chinese folk religion with a bit of 打小人 (Hit the little man) by the street-side whilst burning joss sticks & joss paper. :D
The YouTube video I stumbled across (above) is actually a bit of slapstick-come-observational comedy from Singapore, the other ex-British colonial outpost and is really rather hilarious even if you don’t know any of the Chinese dialects. I’d probably consider it “not work safe” on the basis you may be in stitches laughing like an idiot which may prove detrimental to your job. :P
Ignore the first minute where it’s some (unfortunately rather catchy) Mandarin song which features two of the actors in the sketch that follows. The woman actually starts the 打小人 (Hit the little man) proper in English followed by the man doing the same in Malay! Then cometh the Chinese dialects, which if I’m not mistaken include 閩南語 (Hokkien), 廣東話 (Cantonese), 海南話 (Hainanese) and 福州話 (Hokchew/Fukkien).
The 廣東話 (Cantonese) bit, spoken by the woman is if I’m not mistaken:
打你個死人頭！打死你唔出頭！打你個死人口！打到你爛死嘴！打到你全身爛晒！打到你全家……瞓低！打！打！打！
… translates (roughly) to:
Hit you on your damn head! Hit you till retract your head (like a tortoise)! Hit you on your damn mouth! Hit you till your damn lips are busted! Hit you till your body is all broken! Hit all your family until they are in a coma! Hit! Hit! Hit!
Then the man replies (in 廣東話 (Cantonese), though seemingly with a heavy 潮州話 (Teochew) accent) chastising the woman on what an evil vindictive person she is! Rinse, wash, repeat! :D
